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Do you ever feel like there's too much on your plate? The stress is getting to you and sometimes even making you snippy with others?

I've been thinking a lot lately about our propensity to judge others -- to look at another person's decisions, character traits, and even how they choose to apply inspiration -- and judge them -- especially when we're stressed.

I learned a lot about not judging and about perspectives while researching an 80-year-old mystery for my novel, An Uncertain Justice, To write the book, I studied various accounts of a murder. They were from newspapers, books, family records, and personal recollections. Interestingly, most saw the event differently. In endeavoring to be as accurate as possible, I assumed that each person who gave an account was telling the truth as they remembered it.

I did not assume that one person was lying or another exaggerating, but only that they all were somehow telling the truth as they perceived it. This enabled me to put together a richer story, and I believe, solve a mystery. I began to understand that truth is a composite of perspectives.

We all look at life through our own lens of life experiences, backgrounds and beliefs. We filter everything we see and experience through those lenses. That includes how we look at other people's actions.

In Luke 10:38-42, there's an account of Jesus visiting Martha and her sister Mary. In the account Martha is "cumbered about much serving." In other words, Martha is stressed out with all the tasks on her plate. She's slaving over a hot stove, trying to make the house presentable for the Master, and doing all she knows how to do to serve Him.

While she's doing this, Mary is sitting at Jesus' feet, listening to Him teach her about the gospel. This is a rare opportunity for women of the day. Women of that period were not allowed to discuss religious matters with men.

At some point, Martha comes to Jesus and says, "Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? Bid her therefore that she help me."

Jesus answers her, "Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things; but one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part which shall not be taken away from her."

Instead of judging Martha or Mary in this incident, what if we see the truth of it as Jesus is seeing it? He knows both their hearts. Time and again, we read in the Bible where Jesus perceives people's thoughts. He knows what both Martha and Mary are thinking. He's seeing that Martha is going above and beyond to do everything she knows how to do. He sees that this is making her stressed and worried -- "troubled." He sees that Mary is taking advantage of a rare opportunity to sit at His feet and learn about the things of eternity.

He brings to Martha's attention that she has a choice. She doesn't "have" to stress over dinner. She doesn't "have" to make the house perfect. She's chosen to do those things, while Mary has chosen to be at the Master's feet. He's pointing out that the dinner will be eaten and the house will get dirty again, but it's not every day you can sit at the feet of the Creator of worlds and learn from Him personally. That experience can never be taken away from Mary.

It's interesting to note that in her state of stress, Martha has shifted to judgment. We all tend to do this. How many times have you been left to clean up a mess and gotten irritated that no one is helping you? I know I have!

In her stressed state, Martha is judging Mary as lazy. She's also putting herself on a pedestal as a hard worker, a martyr who has to do so much. Are you noticing the "do" versus "be" words in this story? Martha is convinced that she has to be doing while Mary is content in simply being at the Master's feet.

I've been like Martha a good portion of my life. Oh, I'm not some dutiful immaculate housekeeper by any stretch! But I've been a workaholic. I've felt that unless I'm doing something, I'm not valuable as a person. I had to realize two things.

• First, I have a choice. I didn't have to do all the things I chose to do. They didn't make me a better person, and God didn't require them of me.
• Second, I had to understand that being who God created me to be is more important than doing a bunch of stuff.

Keywords: stress management, stress relief, Mary and Martha, stressed out, coping with stress

About the Author
Marnie Pehrson, Ringgold GA USA
marnie@marniepehrson.com
More Details about coping with stress here. Did you know that you were born with a powerful message that you are uniquely designed to deliver? Like a gorgeous garden around a central theme, you’re prepackaged with talent seeds to help you convey your message. Marnie Pehrson (a wife and mother of 6) has been helping people like you start online businesses and earn money from their talents since 1994. She is the author of 26 books and ebooks on such topics as How to Get More Done in a Day than Most People Accomplish in a Week and You’re Here for a Reason: Discover and Live your Purpose. Marnie loves working with entrepreneurs and helping them monetize their gifts so they can deliver their messages in ways that impact the world for good. Consider her a cultivator of soil -- a waterer of crops -- who is here to help you reap an abundant harvest! Get the first 50 pages of You’re Here for a Reason for FREE.

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